"We" had two 90g tanks. My reef and "his" aggressive fo
tank. As you said it was really just all mine and all my work. If something needed to be built(stand, canopy etc) he was more than happy to help with that. However feeding, cleaning, testing, water changes etc were up to me. It really isn't too much more work, but it is work. It also takes financially away from the reef. We also had alot more problems with fish deaths for some reason and never were able to figure that out. We finally decided after losing several very expensive fish to ??? to sell the fo
. Now we have a much fuller reef and we setup a small 20g in the kids room. The point isn't whether it's that much more work, the point is that it IS some more work and expense, and it's all falling on you and you seem to have a full plate as it is. If he's gone all week and you are there with kids, school and the everyday job of making a house run, you should not feel selfish in saying "NO
. This is too much. Maybe when I get out of school or when you can be home more often to help with the tank and enjoy it". Sooner or later, one or the other of the tanks or your school or your kids, are going to start suffering from inattention. When you spread yourself too thin everyone suffers especially you.. This is my opinion and of course, as always, take it or leave it.