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Old 11-01-2006, 09:55 PM   #41
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This is a great thread. I am single, but I would be really disappointed if my spouse didn't support my hobbies. I can see how the expense would potentially be an issue though. Anything expensive has the potential to be an issue I suppose... I guess its about priorities though. If the money is there, why not spend it on something that makes you happy? And of all hobbies, I would like to see my spouse interested in something that keeps them around the house too. Better than off on the golf course/bowling alley/basket weaving studio/bar or something all day long. If money is tight though, better to hold off on that extra fish/tank/gadget and as my ex used to say "get the kids that loaf of bread they've been bugging me for".

My only advice is that generally, when people are a little hostile about stuff like this, its really because they are feeling resentful or even jealous about the amount of attention their loved one is giving something other than them. Sometimes we all need little reminders from loved ones that we are their proprity even if it seems like they are pouring all of their efforts into a hobby (or whatever it may be).

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Old 11-02-2006, 10:36 AM   #42
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First of all, weekf, your wife should be ashamed of herself! No one should speak that way to someone they love.

Secondly, my husband is a big baby and won't play fish tank because I know more than him and it makes him feel stupid. Oy! He does love our big pleco, and will bring home a female betta in a cup once in a while as a surprise for me.

I do feel a little odd in that I cook more often for the fish/dog/cats than I do for us. Ah well-


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Old 11-03-2006, 10:38 PM   #43
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i still live at home, so if i convince my mom to buy a fish, you should see all my sisters in protest, ive never seen such an outcry since the vietnam riots. they all say how much they hate the aquarium, and blah, blah, but i always catch them sitting around in some time or another, watching the fish
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Old 11-04-2006, 12:10 AM   #44
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My husband really isn't into the tanks too much. He just doesn't see the facination. He knows that I enjoy them so he tolerates them, especially since I fund them with my own personal spending cash. There's a reason we set aside a certain amount of money each month that belongs to each of us for personal use, that way we can spend it on the things we want and don't have to justify it to the other.

Now since my son was born and has started to show an interest in the fish and tanks, my hubby pays more attention to the tanks. He'll sit with my son and the two of them will watch the tanks together. It's a way for him to spend time with our son, and he enjoys watching our son enjoy the tanks. He even sometimes notices when I've done extra cleaning. "Hey you cleaned the tank, I can actually see through the glass again." Heh... gotta love algae issues.
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Old 11-04-2006, 02:18 AM   #45
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My wife is great... when we first met I had a FW tank, so she has always known what she is getting into. She has never been into this hobby like I am..but she has horses and knows what obsession is all about,lol. She will sometimes complain about the money I spend on this, but I have to admit she is 100% right and I know it...I am lucky to have her , she may not always agree but she understands. Plus, she is very house proud and if I am going to have these tanks in the house they have to look good...suits me fine.
She does get into it as well though...sometimes shocks me how well she knows the fish and coral species.
Another thing to take into account is to resist the temptation to talk about fish etc ALL the time. Nothing will push people further away than constant talk about something they are not that interested in. Think about people who rave on about politics,religion or whatever. They make you cringe? Dont do that to your partner or you will force them away...thats what I think anyway.
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Old 11-08-2006, 08:54 PM   #46
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just as an update, MY tank has turned into OUR tank... LOL. i say good, now he can help pay for all the stuff! specially since i bought 80% and i make less, hehe... is that wrong??
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Old 11-09-2006, 09:38 AM   #47
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I don't know how it's going to go but I can say when I suddenly wanted to keep fish again my bf started hatching a plot to buy me a tank set up for christmas. And since I obviously can't wait until Christmas he's been encouraging me to just go buy the tank and d*mn the cost.

Of course, he has a CD buying that is truely impressive so he understands about hobbies.
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Old 11-09-2006, 10:23 AM   #48
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Get him an IPOD for Christmas in return. Buying CDs???? Not me anymore.
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Old 11-09-2006, 10:32 AM   #49
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Originally Posted by austinsdad

Get him an IPOD for Christmas in return. Buying CDs???? Not me anymore.
I think that would only exacerbate it. He has over 5000 CDs and still collecting. We don't possibly have enough computer to rip even half of what he'd want to. Right now I'm focusing on cd racks so we can get them all out of boxes at least
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Old 11-09-2006, 11:19 AM   #50
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My husband acts like he is not into it and was really upset when my SW tank crashed and we had to give up the SW thing (too expensive) because we had over $1500 invested in it and only had it up and going for 3 months. He does enjoy it though because he would be over there talking to the fish and watching it more than I was. I can't wait to get my FW started etc..

I have to admit though, he doesn't complain when he had to help me with water changes.

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