I think I’m about done with school.

[shawmutt]

On Monday, I walked into my physics class late. I was exhausted from working my third shift job and overslept. I couldn’t skip class, because there was a test that day. So I went in, apologized to the teacher, and sat down. He handed me the test, and I started to work on it—or, more precisely, stare at it in a panic. I didn’t remember a single thing I had studied. After about 5 minutes of staring at the test, I got up, handed in the test blank, apologized once again, and walked out.

I think I’m about done with school.

A person can tell the state of my being without even knowing me. All they have to do is look at my houseplants and fish tanks. Well, my houseplants are withering and dying and my planted tank is growing more algae than plants. My entire social life consists of my wife and the two forums I belong to. I haven’t called family or old friends since school started. I am so unbelievably tired and I feel like I’m in a fog all the time—I cycle between a caffeine fog and an exhaustion fog. I’ve had a headache that just won’t quit. I am only taking two classes this semester, but between classes and labs I’m in school Monday through Friday.

I started college at 24, and I will be 30 and just getting an associate’s degree in Biology. My wife and I talked about having kids at the end of the school year, and we are saving towards a house. She has her Bachelors and is going for her Masters in education, and has a good job. I have a good job in a biotech company that has a lot of opportunity for growth (I know corporations tell their employees that all the time, but since I started a year and a half ago I’ve gotten promoted and a nice raise). Things are pretty stable. I understand that situations change, but I fail to see how a degree will make much difference. I want kids, I want to be able to take care of a house, and I want to have a hobby. I want to be able to play my video games without feeling extremely guilty for wasting time. Something has to go.

I’ve talked to my physics teacher about tutoring, and will be finishing these last two classes to get my associates (my other class is chem, but that’s cake for me) but I don’t think I’ll be going to a four year school. It sucks, because I was going to be the first in my family with a degree, but I think it just wasn’t meant to be.

Alright, I’m sitting here and nodding off, just thought I’d share where I was at.

 

[Fluff]

Wow shawmutt. I got tired just reading that. It really does sound like you need to take a step back. To many obligations and not enough time for yourself. That's not healthy physically or mentally. You'll do what's best for you but I wish you luck in your decision. Take care.

 

[talloulou]

I’ve talked to my physics teacher about tutoring, and will be finishing these last two classes to get my associates (my other class is chem, but that’s cake for me) but I don’t think I’ll be going to a four year school. It sucks, because I was going to be the first in my family with a degree, but I think it just wasn’t meant to be.

If you get your associates that's a degree isn't it?

 

[lyquidphyre]

I degree in Biology isn't the easiest thing to do, especially when you already have a life. Some of the classes are a piece of cake, some are really difficult, and the labs take up the majority of your time but you get very little credit for them.
If you feel your sanity is at risk... it is okay if it wasn't meant to be.
Also, you might consider taking classes with out labs, or just take one class whenever you feel you would be able to. Maybe don't give up, but just take a break.

 

[Menagerie]

Know when to walk away! I pushed myself through two degrees and then moved the household (menagerie and all) to Canada to get my doctorate. Looking back on it, I can see that I was never going to finish the docorate. Now, I have walked away from the whole biological field and started a home based business--I am so relaxed!

Finish up this semester and enjoy all that you have accomplished. Going back to school deserves a major pat on the back--heck, I'd give you a hug if I were there. It seems that when you are in school, that's all there is. The mind set is "if you don't finish school, there will be nothing for you." Yet, I have found that being in school through my 20s did not let me focus on what is important to me. Find what is important to you and go after it! Take a nap first and try to get rid of that headache, but once you make up your mind, you will feel so free.

 

[Toirtis]

I degree in Biology isn't the easiest thing to do, especially when you already have a life. Some of the classes are a piece of cake, some are really difficult, and the labs take up the majority of your time but you get very little credit for them.
If you feel your sanity is at risk... it is okay if it wasn't meant to be.
Also, you might consider taking classes with out labs, or just take one class whenever you feel you would be able to. Maybe don't give up, but just take a break.

I agree...I can't imagine my life now meshed with my school days....just not enough hours in the week.

 

[Jchillin]

The fact that you are taking the time to re-rvaluate things speaks volumes about your ability to come to grips with life and what's important.

It's a fact that some folks don't take this needed "step back" and rather than face reality, they regret what their life has become.

I agree with taking a moment and checking things through. I think I mentioned this once before...everyone in my family thought it would be great if I went and got myself an MBA. This was based solely on the grades I recieved in math.

Within the first couple of semesters, I realized that it wasn't for me. I pursued another career and I'm glad I did.

 

[fishyrican]

I've said this before here, and I'll say it again. I think having a college degree is important, but I also believe that importance is often overstated. It sounds to me like you may be on the verge of losing or seriously affecting some of the things that truly are important in your life.

I commend you for considering a break. Be realistic with yourself--most people who take time off will never return. That's not necessarily a bad thing. Enjoy your job, your family, your hobbies, and your time. There's no price to be put on the ability to sleep with peace and wake up with a smile. In the grand scheme of things, you were hired for your abilities and your wife chose you because she wanted to be with you. If being tired is negatively affecting either of those, ssomething's got to give.

My wife tells me of a funeral she attended for a man she knew. Many people stood up and told of what he did for the community, the church, and other people. His son spoke at the end and said something along the lines of "I'm sorry you were never home, but at least I now know where you were."

Again, education is important, but not that important. Take a break.

I didn't mean to ramble on so long. Good luck. :?

 

[malkore]

All I can say is, you're an adult, not a 19 year old in college...but a real adult, with a real job and life commitments. Maybe you just need a semester off...or maybe you just need to wash your hands clean.

I was 'forced' to go to college and get a BA by my parents. While I cannot say I hated my tiem in college, I similarly cannot say I ever want to go back for a different degree, or to get my masters.

You're the best judge of what's right for you. It sounds like you don't have pressure from your wife to stay in school, so if you feel THIS is the road to travel, hop on and get going to greener hills

 

[flamingonhot]

i kinda felt like that...going to school and everyhting in my life didnt really have any point..nobody to talk to,everybody hating me for some reason..... not exactly the same thing thats wrong with you but still a little bit.

get your degree......just because you feel like this now you shouldnt jepordize your whole future but not finishing...if you have to take a break get everything settled out then get back into school if you still want ot and good luck!

 

[shawmutt]

If you get your associates that's a degree isn't it?

I mean a bachelor's. Unfortunately an associate in Biology is about as useless as (insert clever analogy here). Needless to say I won't be leaving on any research ships to study abroad (unless I'm a deckhand), getting my own TV show, or having a nice cushy retirement teaching a college course and writing books.

Part of the problem is that I was sure I'd take a course and wind up being a prodigy--a misunderstood Will Hunting who would change the world for the better. What I found is that I'm not a "natural" with any of it--every course is a course in frustration and progressively harder work. Although I do well with Chemistry I have only taken the first two years of courses in it.

So, I want to take time off, but I know from people I talk to, and like fishyrican said--most people do not return from this "time off". I have many other interests I would like to pursue that don't involve a bachelors in biology.

 

[zenn]

i feel your pain. I've worked full-time pretty much my entire college career. But that's all going to change as of today. I quit my job and am going to live poor....simply because i can. I'm still getting a small monthly allowance from the national guard, which will keep me over for now. But i was in the same boat as you sort of. School and work at the same time is ridiculous. Especially when you're taking 15 hours and working 40+ hours a week and still trying to maintain a social life. So i saved up some money, and have decided to forgo a good amount of money just so that i can have my sanity back and enjoy my last year in college. What it comes down to is just how much you're willing to put up with. Do what you gotta do man and try not to worry so much about it.