Well,

[partypalooza5]

looks like I can no longer enjoy the fish keeping hobby. Parents got ultra strict for some reason now I may have to sell what I have.

I guess I begged them to let me get a bigger tank too much?

Oh well..

 

[FishEggs]

hide it under the bed. they dont have to know you still have it.

That so totally sucks but some day you'll have your own place and i'm sure you will resume this addictive hobby with only financial boundaries to stop you from doing what you want.

I'm sure there will be plenty of us still here to help get you back up and running when you do.

 

[ezy33]

Your parents are probably pulling the food over fish gambit. Lately times have been hard, like I'm down to two SW tanks and will be shutting down number two this weekend.


"ENGINEERS MOTTO: If it ain't broke, take it apart and fix it"

"Service Tech's Motto: If ti ain't broke, lube it.

 

[joy13]

The thing about being a parent one of the hardest things I have had to do is keeping my son from a hobby I knew that was good for him. Usually it is because of the cost or room. I use to hate when I would hear "I want it I will do anything to get it." Last time he said that he sold his 65 mustang to make room for a 75 gremlin. I just threw up my arms and said well he is an adult but WHY WHY a GREMLIN? I had a sick feeling when signing the title over on the mustang to the new owner (he wasn't old enough when I got it for him to have it titled in his name). I knew the mustang served hits purpose but I still miss the rumble when he would start it or come home.

What is the reason for your parents wanting you to get out of the hobby?

 

[partypalooza5]

Today they said it was because I need to save for college and I cant go spending 300 bucks for a SW tank. Plus my mom said its WAY too much work for SW. (my neighbors have a SW tank and they NEVER clean it or take care of it AT ALL. So she thinks all SW tanks are like that). oh well.

I guess I can do whatever I want when I'm done with college!

 

[atomiclord]

Just study some marine biology.... "I have to grow SW fish to study them..."

 

[thatmagicguy]

Parents just keep breaking kids and don't consider for a moment the damage they are doing, the cycle goes on and on and on,,,,

My dad was a mentally ill tyrant. I started keeping fish when I was 8. For a year I had to hide the first fish I had, and only once I bred some bettas and got real cash for them did he show any enthusiasm.

I had periods during my youth and teens where I would have to get rid of my tanks, only because he would wake up one day and decide that I couldn't have them. I think it was because he couldn't stand to see his son finding pleasure in something,,he was so miserable.

The truth is, as a parent, there couldn't be a better hobby for your kids to have. Especially teenagers. When you consider the alternatives of them hopping in the car and heading to destinations unknown doing who knows what,,,I would rather have my kid parked in front of an aquarium and spending their money on protein skimmers and cannister filters rather than bags of weed or worse.

The hobby is an educational one in every aspect of it. Kids that are active in the aquarium hobby excel in math, science, and do better in school overall. Studies have been done and these are the facts.

My guess is, even without the data to support it, that kids that go smoke weed and drink and party and sneak around outside the home do not get good grades. Unless they are buying the drugs from a teacher.

I'm sorry you are going through this with your parents. I do not have all of the facts, and there are always two sides to a story, but really, the last thing I'm taking away from my daughter is her aquariums.

You will be old enough to move out soon enough. Just stick it out, be tough, and stay off the dope, and don't get anyone pregnant.

Bill

 

[partypalooza5]

My mom gets mad at pretty much everything I enjoy xD. She got mad at me for trying to raise baby cichlids and sell them. "Who will buy those??"

I will spend the next few years learning about the corals and fish and everything.

 

[atomiclord]

Wise words...

Don't worry, I'm only 18 (although that does mean I can drink / drive / vote here) and I used to try to fight for a tank. I've just been through my first year of university basically living at friends' houses until I got my license and bought my car. After a while parents usually realise you're a young adult and change their attitude somewhat. Rent here is pushing AU$350 / week for a one bedroom unit, let alone a house, so there's no way I can afford to move out on my own, but I'm finally back at home more than 10 hours per week. I pay my board, and no longer interact with most of them if I can help it. One day I basically just bought a fishtank and set it up. You can't exactly return it once you do that

Things get better. Nothing good happens fast in a SW tank anyway, so just think of it as training. Also, use the time to plan out your ultimate tank, and use our tanks and experiences as guinea pigs so you don't make most of the mistakes

Alternatively, get a job at a LFS near college, and care for a display tank there...

And definately don't get anyone pregnant.

 

[joy13]

Parenting is the hardest relationship I have ever had to deal with. You want what is best for your child and sometimes they make some really bad choices that can follow them around for a life time so you try to point them in the right direction. Being the child was the easiest my parents weren't perfect but I lived through it. l learned from my parents mistakes and hope I didn't make the same ones.

I was lucky my sons hobbies were cars and computers he used all his spare money on them so he didn't have any for drugs, drinking or women. Buying gas for a 289 wasn't cheap so I didn't have to worry about where he was. Like I said previously the mustang served its purpose well. I had to listen for hours at a time about a certain engine or some new something or rather for a computer. Most of was over his fathers and my head but we listened and when his dad died I listened and tried to understand a little about cars.

What are you going to study in college? I hope your parents are giving you their input and then allow you to decide what right for you.

 

[partypalooza5]

I guess this sort of thing happens to a lot of people XD.

I'll live, it's not like it's a once in a lifetime sort of thing.

I understand I need to save up for college and stuff.

And I want to study in electrical engineering or marine biology .

 

[joy13]

Both of those are great choices.

Go for electrical engineering first so you can take up marine biology next with the money you make. Just my 2 cents.

 

[Mystery]

If you make the tank hard work for your parents they will start talking about getting rid of it. So I suggest you make the tank no work and little cost. For example, don't beg for upgrades, don't talk about it all the time so you seem not to have a normal balance of interests, do maintanence task while they are not there, never leave a mess afterwards, use cheap options and made at home options, trade fish rather than buying them, join local fish clubs so they can see it as a happy social activity not a solitary obsession, conserve resources by testing etc only when you really need to etc.

The parents see the tank however you let them see the tank--make it look good! Talk to them about it only occassionally and in a positive way. For example, do you thank your parents for new purchases by cooking them a meal or some other gesture?

 

[partypalooza5]

I usually (98% of the time) spend my own money on fish supplies and stuff. Only on a rare occasion do I ask my parents for money to buy the fish food.

The tank has been stable and clean for quite some time now (should do more water changes..)

It's not the tank itself they complain about its just the money and the fact that I'm pretty much obsessed XD.


However:
My mom just told me we don't have room for a bigger tank, the only place we have room is in the garage.

If I didn't live in Texas I'd consider it. But the heat/cold would probably be too much . I was actually designing a rack system with multiple tanks plumbed together a few weeks ago..