I like my eshopps skimmer on my 55 reef. There are others that die by the reef octopus skimmers as well. There are other brands that are popular and I'm sure they will be brought up.
As for the lights, it depends on what you want to keep. I'd simply go with the chinese 'knockoff' panels as they are as cheap as possible and will let you keep anything photosynthetic that your heart desires.
As for a return pump, how much GPH
are we looking at? I like the danner mag that runs my system, but I'm not sure how big they go.