Covincing People To Rethink Their Fish. . . Can You Help?

[honmol]

Both my dad and a friend have kept fish for awhile, both think that they are doing nothing wrong. My dad overstocks tanks and stunts his fish. My friend does (for one thing, not the biggest, but the most recent) his cycling with fish. Not without. He also seems to have a habit of not testing his water and does nothing to keep the snail population under control or to clean algae from his tanks. Neither do the weekly water changes (one does every other month, one only changes water to clean the tank) Both think that what they're doing is fine. How can I convince them that it's not?

 

[ChileRelleno]

Bwahahahahahaha Goodluck!

Very casually try to educate, make suggestions, lead by example, do full spectrum water testing in front of them of their tanks PH, NH3, NO2, NO3, GH & KH, explain the NO2 Cycle to them (compare it to them swimming in a cesspool), buy them up to date books on aquaria (pay them to read'em)
.............

Bwhahahahahahaha You can lead the ignorant to knowledge and wisdom, you can shout it in their ear, but alas....
You can't make'em comprehend it and take it to heart.

Goodluck!

 

[lyquidphyre]

Well, with your dad you might have more room to step on his toes (something about family members- you can tell em what to do with out stepping on egg shells).
Just explain to him about overstocking and to be careful or he could lose all his fish.

Cycling with fish isn't horrible, but you might politely say "Did you know you can cycle your tank with ammonia or a product called Bio Spira? This way you lose no fish, what so ever."

With the snails you could say "Hey, I have a fish that eats snails, do you mind if I collect a few of yours" and then just take over his tank- clean the algae and test his water... and play it off by saying "Since my hands were already in your tank, I went ahead and blah blah blah" and from there you can say "Did you know your water is reading X, when was the last time you did a water change" and educate him that way.

 

[Elmware]

It's unfortunate that when I first got an aquarium about 15 years ago, a bok which came with the starter kit never even mentioned that you need to change the water every week or day. The book didn't even mention anything about pH levels. I only found out about that when my mother bought me a pH test kit.

I had two silver dollar fish which amazingly never died when I only used to change the water to clean the tank whenever the alge got really bad. Every other fish I put in there didn't last long.

If it wasn't for sites like this one on the internet, I'd probably be still making the same mistakes today and still wondering why my fish were dying right away.

Maybe I should sue Hartz for the lack of information they put in their books which were supposed to tell you what you need to know to get started looking after your fish. They probably don't even care because it just keeps suckers comming back to the lfs to buy more fish.

 

[BrianNY]

Great thread honmol. Simply put, the problem is how people define a succesful tank. Too many people believe that fish deaths are inevitable and just a part of owning an aquarium. The little fishy lives are expendable because they're easily replaced for a few bucks. Although they might want their fish to survive, in the final outcome they really don't care and aren't willing to put the effort in.

 

[TankGirl]

I have gone through this before, and for the most part people do not want to hear it. If they are happy with the tank and it is satisfying their needs they get defensive if you suggest they are not going about it in the "best" way.

I have even had people ask me to come over to help them with a tank where they were having trouble getting it cycled, and did not like what I suggested, almost arguing with me about it. I wanted to say, "well, you asked!" and they just went on their merry way killing fish. Like the rows of wretched tanks at Walmart, I have learned to turn a blind eye to the 10gal with 3 oscars in it. 8O

 

[talloulou]

The best way is to have a beautifully maintained fish tank with healthy vibrant fish. This should work especially well with family members. Lead by example. Talk is cheap so you have to show people your way is better. Most people don't listen when you tell them stuff but if they see your tank and start asking questions about how come your fish are so colorful, growing so fast, whys your water so clear then all the sudden they think your advice might be worthwhile afterall.

And with some things they may never agree with you. For example I have cycled every freshwater tank I have ever owned with fish. And I don't believe the fish suffered for it. But I choose hardy fish that I was planning on keeping and did tons of water changes and monitored closely with tests. And of course I add my fish slowly. Is fishless cycling better......maybe. But sometimes you get an old dog who just refuses to learn new tricks, especially if the old school way still works fine.

 

[ChileRelleno]

Lead by example

Lead by example

Lead by example, as long as you educated yourself and tried to educate others then you should have peace of mind.

 

[Zagz]

I'd have to agree, lead by example. People are very narrow minded sometimes and often don't think of fish as pets. The ones that have been keeping fish for years can be old school and not willing to change, the ones that are new to the hobby may only be interested in a little work, not really concerned with doing the work necessary to maintain a tank properly. If they consider fish "disposable", there isn't much you are going to be able to do to convince them differently/

 

[honmol]

My friend is amazingly stupid. He got a few peaceful fish with big colorful fins and some barbs to cycle his tank. He really thinks of them as disposable. Once he's done cycling he puts them in bowls or jars or kills them. People should need a licence to keep pets. When I wanted to get one of my dogs someone came to make sure that the house would be a good environment for her. Why do people seem to care less about fish?

 

[tazcrash69]

People tend to care less about fish for a few reasons:
1) you can't cuddle or pet a fish (exception LFS had a cat fish that liked to have it's belly rubbed)
2) For most people fish are food not friends (Sorry Bruce, Anchor, Chum, and Dory)
3) There is the myth that fish don't think fish live long.

I can't tell you how many people say I'm lying when I tell them I have 5 year old Australian Rainbows, Pearl Danios, and tri-color sharks.

 

[Zagz]

People also tend to view fish as dumb animals, incapable of entertainment, or of recognizing their owners. Both of these are completely untrue, my fish provide me with hours of entertainment and they know it is me at the tank vs. my husband who doesn't feed them!

 

[Mad Professor]

Call me hypocrite, But I too was one of those people stubborn as a mule.

But somehow I managed to keep my fish alive.
Well anyways, I've pulled out my old fish books, which I have 8 of them.
And none of them mention PWC or test kits. They tell you to get a UGF which I find those UGF a helping hand in my maintenance. They tell you to get a powerhead, and HOB filter. They tell you how to maintenance them all and how to clean your tank but the missing that small bit of info on PWC and test kits.
but then again most of the books are roughly 5 years old.
So I think the books are partly to be blamed on, along with Corp. LFS store on the lack of experience and information.

Sad but I still don't think of fish as pets, but I do want them to survive.
But anyways, just lead by an example my neighbor is a noobie in this hobby. He's always asking "how come my tanks are always clean?". I say the key to it; is maintenance.

 

[coolchinchilla]

If the topic can come up, mention how the water conditions affect fish.

Fish have to live literally in their own toilet. If you don't do any water changes, then the fish feces and urine remain in the tank. Over time that builds up. If you wait 4 months between water changes, the those fish have 120 day's worth of their own filth to swim in, "breath," exercise, drink, etc. Not too good. Not kind to the fish. Ask your friends if they would like to live in a latrine permanently. 8O That's what it's like for our fish if we neglect water maintaince.

If I don't feel like doing a water change, I look at my fish and think that they would benefit so much from just a fresh breath of "air" (water). Then I'm happy to do it.

My 2 cents.

 

[greenmaji]

Most people dont understand nitrate.. what it is exactly or what it can do long term.. most old master testkits didnt even come with a nitrate testkit (because fish can survive with some nitrate). They dont understand that there filtration system is incomplete and its not removing everything..

 

[Zagz]

What you are saying is very true GM. I have family members that have kept fish for years and all I ever hear out of them about nitrate is "nitrates don't harm fish". No matter how hard I try I can't change their minds.

Coolchinchilla, the living in their own toilet literally is a good way to put it. Even though I know it is true, never thought about putting it exactly that way.