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Old 06-10-2005, 07:16 AM   #1
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Ever had one of those decades??

Well its not quite a decade but about 4 years. I just need somewhere to rant for a sec, Im sorry. Have you ever just have your life go to crap so continuously, and just when something goes right...2 others go horribly wrong??? I mean what the heck? Just one thing after another??
First I get a really good job, the best I've ever had. Pays really really good, isn't to unbearable. My husband has a good job too, afeter us struggling for the first few years were married. Then my grandfather gets Parkinsons and after a brief fight and having to see him wither away he dies. 2 weeks after that I fall on some stairs at work and break my elbow and strain my wrist. It takes 2 years fighting workers comp for me to go back to work (during wich, I only got paid for about 1 year) but 6 months befrore that happens, MCI my husbands employer goes bankrupt and lays him off. It take 1 year for him to find a new job.

Then when I finally get back to work 3 months into it, some guy with dementia yanks on my arm and rips my rotator cuff. It takes 6 months and 4 doctors to find the real diagnosis, and 1 year to get my surgery. But not before they cut my workers comp to hardly nothing and then guess what??? My husband loses his job again!!Oh, and we get kicked out of the apartment we've lived in for 6 years because theyre tuning it into low-income housing and we were just to rich to live there I guess and had to move to a more expensive place. Oh, but thats not all.
A few months ago I learn my aunt has breast cancer. Now I don't know my aunt all that well, but my mom recently got really close to her. About 6 weeks ago she accidently overdosed on morphine and aspirated in the hospital and died. So now my mom is a basketcase. Also my grandmother is developing dementia and is really ill.
It's like what else?? What else is coming next?? I had my surgery on the 24th, which I don't recomend to anyone. It was so painful. Still is painful. Especially since my dr gave me percocet and told me that would handle my pain. Ha!! I ended up in the ER getting 2 shots of dilaudid which didn't decrease the pain hardly at all. Ended up getting oxycontnin and double percocet, which I'm still taking 2 weeks later. Oh, and then my incision isn't healing properly. Of course its not. Nothing ever goes right, nothing. Its gotten to the point I just expect the worst or something bizarre to happen, and if something goes right I don't dare get excited or hopeful. Because not long after words something comes and slaps me in the face. Wow, I wrote alot. Thanks if you hung in there for this long. I just need somewhere to rant about the patheticness of my life (if thats a word). I cant really witch to my mom or my husband, I've lost all my friends. My best friend for 10 years, just stopped calling me and moved away.

Luckily I have this site and my tanks to give me some distraction from wanting to jump off a high high building. :P

Fish are friends, not food

We weep for the bird's cry, but not for the blood of a fish. Blessed are those who have voice.

Pinky: "What are those Brain?" (pointing to a group of people protesting)
Brain: "People without jobs Pinky."

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Old 06-10-2005, 09:02 AM   #2
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Oh my.... I am sooo sorry...... Things can go so wrong, and we just stand there wondering what in the world did we do wrong... What God did we tick off??? I know what it like to be sailing along so nicely, and all of a sudden the rug is yanked out from under you.
One thing that my life has taught me, No matter how bad it can get, we all will work thru it. Something always comes thru. Call your Mom, you may be suprised to find that she might need you more then you think. Do let you husband know you are having some stress issues... make SURE the communication is there. If not, your relationship could suffer, only adding even more stress. You dont necessarily need to "witch" to either of them, but to get some things off your back. Maybe they could use the debriefing too. Give a little, take a little... I know the first reaction one may have is "The last thing I need to hear is other peoples problems" but you may also find that hearing other peoples problems MAY (sometimes not) make your realize that maybe your not so bad off. If they are turning your building into a low income housing, are you even sure you would want to live there if it turns to something ugly? At least you have some warning. If it took so long to get the surgery for your arm, maybe the doctors were trying to be conservative, and make sure they were not doing something unnecessary. I know this doesnt make things any easier for you. And I am so sorry your having a tough time right now. But one day you will look around yourself and say wow... It got better... I send hugs your way!! It will get better one day, I promise!!

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Old 06-10-2005, 10:33 AM   #3
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Sounds like you've gone through a really tough spell, but I agree with Melody - you will get through it. You have to sortof "grieve" for yourself and the good things that went to crap, but now is the time to think positively - negative thoughts will not help at all and I believe make things worse.

My husband had a difficult elbow surgery last year and he was convinced he would never be able to do the things he used to do, but in fact his elbow is stronger than it was before, and it all worked out, though for a while there he was taking it pretty hard.

I nursed my father for 2 years with Alzheimer's until a fall did him in, so I also know how horrible that can be, and I really feel for you. Just be there for your family and I think you will find that helping out others will work some wonders in your own life. Best of luck to you
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Old 06-10-2005, 10:38 AM   #4
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That's a lot to deal with and it's good you have this site to help you. You know you can always rant here. Good luck with everything and i really really hope something starts to look up for you. You need it. Try to build on the heart ache as hard as that is. Sometimes hard times make you stronger. Good luck and i also send hugs!
Don't be koi with me

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Old 06-10-2005, 12:30 PM   #5
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When I was going though a difficult time many years ago my mom gave me this card with this poem on it. She had got the card from my uncle when she was going through a divorce. I put the card in my wallet and read it a couple times a week. It was comforting to me and once my life started to straighten out I forgot all about the silly poem. But then my brother went to drug rehab and I remembered it and gave it to him. Now I give it to you.

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
Whe he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

(Author Unknown )
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Old 06-10-2005, 12:56 PM   #6
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Wow...this really reminds me of "Footprints in the sand". Hang in there Dr. GF, things are sure to work out.
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Old 06-10-2005, 01:11 PM   #7
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You certainly have had a tough time. My husband and I have had some pretty tough times too. I know exactly how you are feeling. I really hope things get better for you soon, and just think, if you can handle all this stuff now, you will so much stronger for it later.
Here are some more hugs for you!
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Old 06-12-2005, 03:09 PM   #8
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I don't know if you are a religious woman, but spend some time in prayer and God will give you guidance.

If you don't have time to do it right the first time, when are you going to have time to do it over.
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