A serious problem

[Smidge]

Right guys, i'm gonna need all your help on this one!

How can i convince my wife to let me have a bigger tank? Seriously! I've been trying for about a month now. She understands the stuff about being able to have more fish and different, more interesting varieties. She understands that i love my hobby but she just won't budge on getting a bigger tank. She claims that she hates that designs of all of these cabinet style tanks... The type i was after is not too dissimilar to the Juwel Vision 450.

Any help, greatly received.

 

[justrelax]

How can i convince my wife to let me have

You could end that phrase with anything you wanted, and I wouldn't know the answer. My best guess would be to buy her diamonds, then in all the excitment just bring the big tank home. Maybe she won't notice... Good Luck!

 

[neilanh]

What exactly is it that she is using as a reason to not get a new tank?

If it's the design she doesn't like of the cabinet, couldn't you find something different that would fit your needs and her liking? Maybe you could build (or have built) something unique that she would enjoy as well, and still have the capacity you want in a tank.

 

[Smidge]

Ha ha ha ha! I can barely afford the tank nevermind diamonds! Looks like i'm doomed to live my life a pauper!

Thanks for the advice Neilanh, i'm not sure what it is she doesn't like or whether it's just that she doesn't want me to have a tank period. I also don't think that building anything would be a good idea, i'm not exactly a "hands on" kinda guy. I'm more of a "pay someone to come and do it for me" kinda guy...

 

[neilanh]

Well, I think that's the key. If she's against you having another tank irregardless, you just have to put your foot down as the man in the house and put her in her place.

haha just kidding

but seriously, if she's not necessarily opposed to having a new tank, but instead just doesn't like the look, getting her involved in picking it out and looking at the options may let her get involved and be more open to a new tank. I'm assuming you're more interested in capacity of a new tank rather than the design of the stand/cabinet, so maybe that's a way to get what you want.

 

[cassie]

If it's the cabinets she objects to, surf the net and show her some of the more interesting/unique cabinets available. They don't all have to look like a large black MDF sideboard. There are some really neat ones out there. I know you're in this for the fish, so let her treat the cabinet like a piece of furniture and fuss over it. That way, you both get what you want.

 

[gu2high]

Well, I guess she doesn't want you to spend too much time and/or money on fish and spend more time and/or money on her.

You may try on ebay and search local tank to pick up. Women like shopping and bargain and if you get her involve in it and let her choose the one (you choose first), then you will get the job done easily.

Or, women are more superstitious. If you say the tank and fish can bring luck to the home as asian believe, she may give you a try.

 

[mom2reds]

smidge if you figure out the answer to that ? then maybe you can tell me how to get my husband to let me get a bigger tank. Only is not the look that he doesn't like he just thinks it is a waste of money, even though my three boys and I enjoy it.

Tess

 

[Smidge]

Tess, buy something gadgety with the tank, something like an digital thermometer (?) so that it's a bit like a computer or as i said before, a gadget. Guys love gadgets...

There was some good advice there. I'll try and involve her in the whole process but we can't begin the process yet cos i can't get her to agree to it! Arrrrgh.

I have surfed the net over and over and i can't seem to find anything remotely like what i'm after except the Juwel stuff...

 

[fish 'n' fries]

This may be a money issue...but if it's truly the design of the cabinet... get one made (much cheaper than diamonds). Then you can get wood/style etc that coordinates with your house. My partner is a general contractor and they do lots of custom made things...in fact I've got my order/request in to have her make my cabinet when I get my big tank.

However, it's quite possible that the cabinet's just an easy excuse to not talk about what her real complaints are...if that's the case...you two need to talk.

Good luck!

 

[MyCatsDrool]

this is why i refuse to marry

 

[Smidge]

Ha ha ha ha. Don't worry, my marriage isn't in trouble here guys. I just want a bigger tank and she won't let me.

MyCatsDrool, it's a little late for that i'm afraid....

 

[cassie]

Heh. You just need the right mate, MyCatsDrool. My husband and I are both pretty into our aquarium "hobby" (can anything this expensive still be called a hobby??)

 

[MyCatsDrool]

honestly, i'd just do what i want. I'd get my tank. I'd declare a room in the house mine and declare that i will do as i please in it. She can have her own room too and if she wants to paint it pink with fluffy pillows and doilies, so be it. Put your tank in your room and say that's how it is gonna be.

 

[Smidge]

Now that's why you'll never marry!

 

[MyCatsDrool]

exactly. i am too much a "i'll do whatever i darn well please" person.

 

[Smidge]

Good for you. That's what i say!

Unfortunately i'm more of a "yes honey, whatever you want honey" kind of person. But hey, i can't complain really. I get pretty much everything i want, nice house, nice car if only i could get the nice fish tank!

 

[courtnee]

I am divorced, so I just went and got my big tank and it was only up to me. hehe

If I was in a marriage and my husband said no, there would be a war to start. I would need a better excuse than he didn't like the styles of tanks because there are a lot of options.

If money was the issue, that could be a real valid complaint. However, it can be overcome just like anything else. I work hard, and if there is something I want in reason I feel I should be able to get it.

It is one thing to just run out and buy it. Another to plan for it and be prepared to get it. Sitting down going over tanks, finding the one that you like the most and she accepts the look. A plan of how long before you can buy it (within reason). I would be willing to give up eating out for dinner as much to save for it etc. To reason on it.

Also my LFS here has huge sales on tanks about 2 times a year. You can save a lot of money. That is when I plan to get my 125gl. Also a guy that lives next to me is selling 29GL tanks that have stands with them for $75 because he got newer at a good tank sale. That is a steal but I dont want a 29gl. lol I have thought about it for my bedroom though.

Craigs list as well has steals on large tanks. If the money is right, there cant be much complaint about style IMHO.

Wish you luck!

 

[Smidge]

Thanks Courtnee.

Your links to LFS won't work for me as i am in UK. But thanks anyway.

Don't worry you guys, i'll wear her down. I just thought this would be a fun topic.

 

[SparKy697]

you just have to put your foot down as the man in the house and put her in her place.

That's a classic!

I do agree with Mycatsdrool 100%. I have always had a room in the house that is mine to do with as I please. As well as most of the basement. I think we all need that so you have a place to go and be sane for a little while. I am a hobby person though and having my space is more of a necessity than a luxury.