Tonight on Fox 74; a local aquarist tragically loses finger to a murderous trigger fish. It is currently unknown when the fish developed the blood lust but locals in his neighborhood express sorrow and concern for the now rampant killer fish.
"I was sitting at home doing the dishes when I heard the screams. I knew that man kept aquariums but I had no idea he was keeping such dangerous animals."
"I mean yeah I'm sorry for his loss but I have two kids and a dog to think about. What if he escapes? Does he know what to do? If you ask me the city needs to put that killer down."
We contacted city officials but they declined to give an official statement however a low level councilwoman did tell us that "we know that people have their right to keep and enjoy their hobbies, all of them, however when they start threatening the safety and welfare of our community and its residents we must not be hesitant to act to stop more people from getting hurt."
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