How supportive are your partners in this hobby?

[hsherman1986]

My fiancee is very supportive. We have our own "duties" with the tanks. I feed and pick out the fish, he cleans and aquascapes the tanks. I let him know the needs of each fish, and he makes sure he meets those needs in his aquascaping.

He keeps me in control with purchasing fish though. If I could, I would be in the lfs every other day purchasing something new, but he won't let me He almost let me get another clown loach today, but they didn't have any i liked.

All in all though, we are in this hobby together, and we work on the tanks together.

 

[mr funktastic]

most people dont take the appreciation of our tanks casue they dont understand the difficulty of it. when people look at my tanks and i explain they are all live plants they just say cool... i like the red one... but they dont realise what it takes to get those red plants and how much effort it takes to make it look nice. my mom is funny. whenever i tell her to look at soemthing in my tank she acts all uninterested and just glances at it but i have seen her sitting infront of my tank watching it. or she will leave the phone near the tank and then i can tell she was looking lol. same with friends and other people who come over. they ask why u spent 150 dollars on a new filter or 25 dolars on a fish. i just shrug my shoulders and ask why they spend so much money on there hobbies.

 

[Mosaic]

Nobody in my family really understands why I've got the planted tank sickness, but I think they appreciate the fish. All of mine have personalities so they can be fun to watch. Guests LOVE the 13" pleco (me too ).
My bf once let me stop at the lfs before a date. They just happened to have a dream fish I've always wanted. I cancelled the date, bought the fish and went home to acclimate it (took a while - sensitive fish!). He just sat on the bed and looked bored. Poor guy. I haven't really "involved" him since.
But the fish aren't nearly as much work as the plants, and therefore not as satisfying to me. I think only people who know the kind of work necessary for a planted tank can truly appreciate the end result. And that's why I'm here.

 

[Zagz]

My husband started me on this hobby! While he never expected me to go crazy with it, he is very supportive. He is even supporting my choice for a 12th tank.

 

[An t-iasg]

I am glad that my whole family is supportive! My dad gets my CO2 cylinder filled for me. My mom likes to talk to the fish. My husband, while he isn't actively involved on water change day, will always help if I ask. My husband also sometimes leaves little notes about the fish or the tanks for me to find when I get up. (He leaves for work at 6:15 am and I'm not up then!)

My husband and my mom also like to make up names for the plants. They call the ambulia "parsely plant", the lace java fern is "bullwinkle plant", the Ranunculus is "palm tree", the Hydrocotyle is "lily pads", and somehow the Hygrophila is "banana plant"!

Zagz - a 12th tank!?!?!?!

 

[severum mama]

Conclusion: If you get good result without spending any money, women will always be impressed. If you are going to put a great deal of $$$ into it to get that same result, forget it.

C'mon now. That isn't really fair. It isn't just a hobby for men as you can see!

I have 5 FW tanks now. My BF likes them all- he doesn't even mind the loud Emperor on our 45 gallon bedroom tank, nor will he mind the 2 other loud Emperors on the 55 gallon when I move it into the bedroom too! He seems pretty happy about the 90 gallon reef tank that I am planning. He doesn't even complain about the ugly Rubbermaid in our living room that I'm using to cure my LR until I can afford my 90 gallon. But I didn't complain when he spent $600 on a drum rack, either. I think the trick is for BOTH partners to get involved in an expensive hobby! Then, who can complain???


Seriously though, he enjoys looking at them, and he is totally supportive. He was super psyched when I brought home our new angelfish, and he even feigns interest when I start talking about which SW species I want, to the point of looking at the pictures when I Google! He's no help with maintenance though.

*edit* Anne, I completely support your idea for a 12th tank!!!! It makes my 6th tank look totally reasonable.

 

[Glenc]

As a kid I kept fish. I used to keep bonsai as well. I had 20 of them! They took up alot of time, space, and money! With planted tanks I can combine my love of fish and plants into one hobby.
My wife will comment on the tanks when they look good, she has even called me at work when she thinks something is wrong to tell me. I don't think she is thrilled about how much money I've spent, or how much time I spend on my tanks, but she knows I love doing my tanks and she wants me to be happy, god knows I'm a grumpy old fart most of the time!

 

[trotty]

I must be so lucky..... i started the hoby about 4 years ago and we both had to stop each other from buying tanks when we got to 12..... We upsised and sold some of the smaller tanks. We also take equal time with maintenence.
Whats even better, is my fiancee is working in a pet/aquarium store.
She will call me at work from work every order day to beg me to get somthing new....
Soooooo many options with a 240 gal!

 

[weekf]

Man I wish my wife could be more supportive as yours wife/husband. I work 9 to 5 since I haven't bought the timer for the light switches and I will have to ring her at home to switch them on for me when it is time she even gets mad because I am disturbing my 3 yr old son's afternoon nap Or sometimes she will just complain too much trouble.

I have just bought a yellow tang last week and I have been keeping calling her to check if the tang is eating, are there still any nori left on the clips she would tell me to bugger off! I asked her if she could put in some new nori for me if the tang finish it before I can get home she said NO WAY that she will get her hands wet. Heck!

Now you guys can imagine how I am the lonely one into this hobby myself...

 

[Mosaic]

Whats even better, is my fiancee is working in a pet/aquarium store.

Is that why you are marrying her?

 

[austinsdad]

My family is no fun anymore. Although the wife doesn't mind my expenses. At least I'm spending at home.

No one ever even looks in the tank too much. I've had the lights off timer once and no one even noticed and told me that lights were on at 6:30 in the morining.

Well, at least I can spend like I want. They seem to enjoy it when we have company and can show it off. That's all.

We'll see. Got a couple major family gatherings between now and EOY that I'm sure will keep SOME interest up. After that... well maybe I'll trade it in for a boat and only look for the edible fish and crabs instead in the Chesapeake Bay. 8)

 

[roka64]

Nah, I think you just need a bigger tank....somewhere around 500Gallons, they will notice it then!

 

[austinsdad]

 

[TwoHobbies]

I guess I never realized how lucky I am. My wife likes the tank and is the first to ask a guest at our house to look at it. She doesn't complain when I go to the LFS (and she knows I'm coming home with something). I enjoy the hobby and she knows it makes me happy.

Although I don't think I'll be asking about a 12th tank for a long time. ( Cuz I'm in love..........with my house )

 

[weekf]

Well when I say on the phone in the office: "I am going to the fish store after work" She'll say:"What?! Again?!" Because she knows I am going on a spending spree again...

 

[roka64]

Well when I say on the phone in the office: "I am going to the fish store after work" She'll say:"What?! Again?!" Because she knows I am going on a spending spree again...

Ask her to go with you......

 

[weekf]

I have brought her together and my son there many many times even the LFS beautiful giant reef tank still can't impress her. Anyway I try to limit bringing her to the LFS since she can remember most of the products' price!!! I can't mark down the price of an item I buy in future if she sees how much they cost in the shop!!!

The other time she went there and saw the cleaner shrimp cost AUD$150.00 Then almost 1/2 year I bought another shrimp home and was thinking of marking this down to $80.00 but before I open my mouth when I reached home she said:"Isn't that the shrimp that cost $150.00???" now go figure if I ever want to bring her to the LFS again... but I still do though because I would like to draw her into the hobby as well but just seems impossible.

Well about my son, he is 2 and half years old wouldn't know anything about fish but he likes to cuddle the shopowner's cat. That's the only reason he likes to go there. Whenever I say: "Let's go to the fish store" My son will be the first one waiting me by the door.

 

[austinsdad]

weekf wrote:
Well when I say on the phone in the office: "I am going to the fish store after work" She'll say:"What?! Again?!" Because she knows I am going on a spending spree again...
Ask her to go with you......

OK. Leave her home. I see your point now. 8)

 

[Zagz]

Zagz - a 12th tank!?!?!?!

Well you see, it is a necessity. I used to have a tank in my bedroom and in this new house I don't. I figure it is easier to buy a new tank and set it up rather than move one from another part of the house. Am I rationalizing too much?

My husband doesn't do water changes but then again, I rather enjoy my time in the tanks so he feels he might be intruding. If I need help he helps but otherwise, he talks to the fish and watches them.

 

[vsnsofadrgn]

great thread. my b/f is supposrtive, hes even buying the upgrade. we even go to all the lfs about once a month for the day, just the 2 of us. of course, he didnt care too much at first, just if i was happy, lol. now, hes like 'oh, can we have that, oh can we have this'. hes even got 'his own shrimp' in there (cbs). he even helps me with the water changes. he doesnt care how much it costs as long as i buy it, LOL. im kidding, he helps out if i really need something. we are financially challanged, lol. then again, i suppost all of his animals, (we have ALOT: 3 dogs, a kitty, bearded dragon, tortise, 2 snakes, 3 ferrets, 2 fw tanks) so we are balanced! we love animals!